Dispensation Needed For Papal Cats

In the weeks since Pope Benedict XVI’s election, his love for cats has become well known. But this story, reported by the English-language version of a Russian news agency, makes no sense:

"New Pope of Rome Benedict XYI, who moved into the papal quarters last week, faced an unexpected problem — the Vatican administrative services did not allow him taking two cats to his new home.

"Everyone knows about the Pontiff’s love for cats, a representative of the Rome City Hall said on Tuesday. She said the Pontiff now has to pay frequent visits to his old apartment outside the Vatican and take care of his cats. Everyone hopes that the Vatican will eventually grant the cats an access to the Apostolic Palace, she added."

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The Holy Father is the Vatican’s head of state. If he wants to bring his cats to the Apostolic Palace, one would imagine that he could grant himself permission to do so. If anything, one would think that the Vatican’s security specialists would prefer that papal pets live in the papal household rather than having the Holy Father trudge back and forth between the palace and his old apartment to care for his cats.

All in all, the story doesn’t appear to add up; but I could be missing something.

This May Be A Rumor But . . .

REPORTS ARE CIRCULATING THAT SAN FRAN ARCHBISH LEVADA IS ABOUT TO GET THE STOP SLOT AT THE CDF.

EXCERPTS:

"It’s a done deal," a senior Vatican official told TIME on Tuesday, after days of rumors that the American was emerging as the frontrunner. "This was a decision directly from the Pope. Levada was already asked, and has accepted. If it ends up not happening, it means somebody got to [the Pope] and convinced him to change his mind."

Another Vatican source said the former Cardinal Ratzinger and Levada had built what he called a "hidden friendship" over the years outside of the Roman power circles, dating back to the period the American spent as a mid-level official in the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith in the early 1980s. "They would go to dinner together," the source said. "This is someone the Pope thinks he can work closely with."

Levada currently serves as one of four archbishop consulting members of the Congregation. If named to head the office, he would become a Cardinal the next time a new batch were promoted to the title.

MORE ANALYSIS HERE:

MORE EXCERPTS:

Vatican analyst Rocco Palmo, the source of the May 4 report, predicted Tuesday that Levada, 68, would get the Vatican post and then be elevated to cardinal at a June 29 Vatican assembly.

"He will be the first American cardinal named by the new pope,” Palmo said in an interview with The Chronicle. "He is about to become the highest- ranking American in Vatican history."

Palmo noted that Levada has extensive experience dealing with the sexual abuse scandal in the U.S. church.

"He has on-the-ground experience in the United States," Palmo said. "That is priceless."

Levada, who worked on the Vatican staff of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith from 1976 to 1982, has an intimate understanding of the issues facing the U.S. church, having served as the Archbishop of Portland from 1986 to 1995, and since then as the Archbishop of San Francisco.

During his final year in Rome, Levada worked for the pope, known then as Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, the head of that key Vatican office, and has kept close ties to the German cardinal over the last two decades.

"If they want to address the ethical and moral issues in the church in Europe and North America, you have Ratzinger speaking to Europe and Levada to the United States,” said Paul Murphy, a church scholar at the University of San Francisco.

Murphy, the director of the Joan and Ralph Lane Center for Catholic Studies and Social Thought, noted that Levada may serve a very liberal archdiocese, but he carries strong credentials as a doctrinal conservative.

Levada’s election would have a double impact on the Archdiocese of San Francisco, which covers San Francisco, Marin and San Mateo counties.

It would create an opening for the job of San Francisco Archbishop, giving the new pope a chance to put his mark on the Bay Area church.

Pham said Benedict hopes to use his papacy to strengthen ties with the Eastern Orthodox churches, which split off from Rome centuries ago in a dispute over the power of the pope.

"Levada is the academic expert on that topic,” said Pham, author of "Heirs of the Fisherman — Behind the Scenes of Papal Death and Succession.”

Cowboy Up!

Okay. Y’know how the pope’s former car apparently recently sold on the German version of eBay?

He’s apparently trading it in for a pickup!

Okay, okay. It’s not exactly a pick-up. It’s a "pick-up-like vehicle" apparently reverse-engineered from an SUV and outfitted with bullet-proof glass behind where he is to stand, but still

THAT’S GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME!

YEE-HAW!

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Only problem is . . . it’s a Volkswagen. I’m from a car-fixin’ family, and one thing I can tell you: Volkswagens are (or were) high maintenence. I know the pope’s from Germany and all, but I wouldn’t own a Volkswagen (not even a Volkswagen pick-up) if you paid me.

Still, it’s a sign that the pope’s "gone country" in Alan Jackson’s words.

Maybe I’ll send him a Charlie Daniels Band CD to play while he’s drivingbeing driven around in it. (Can’t you just hear him being driven around to "The Devil Went Down To Georgia"?)

Or maybe I’ll send him a pair of boot that he can use with heretics to . . . y’know.

EVIL PEOPLE: “Let The Unholy War Begin”

The Rainbow Sashers aren’t the only dissident folks who are gearing up for campaigns against the new pope.

Planned Parenthood wants to take him on, too.

EXCERPTS:

Planed Parenthood has launched a campaign to motivate all of its members and supporters, nominal Catholics and non-Catholics, to send letters to the editor, requesting that Pope Benedict XVI reconsider his “backward views” and change his opinion on sexual morality.

Pope Benedict XVI must be encouraged to “reconsider his dangerously outdated stances on birth control, abortion and sexuality in order to help move the Catholic Church into the 21st century,” reads a memo issued by campaign manager Eve Fox.

“The new Pope’s positions on these crucial issues pose a terrible danger to the health of millions of women and girls around the world and undermines efforts to prevent the spread of HIV/AIDS,” Fox wrote.

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(CHT to the reader who e-mailed.)

In a related development, Frances Quisling of Catholics For A Free Choice was quoted as saying:

The bad news is that he is Pope, and he was elected by two thirds or more of the princes of the church, who knew what they were doing.

I can no longer delude myself about these princes’ almost total lack of interest in healing the divide in the Church, in showing compassion for or even in listening to the voices of the suffering. The time for nuance is over. Let the unholy war begin [SOURCE–WARNING: Evil Ad].