Children’s Alleged Prayers To God!

Google says that these prayers show up on 512 different Internet sites, so count this one as #513.

I have no idea where these come from or if these are at all authentic, but they’re still funny and charming, so here goes . . .

1.  Dear God,
please put another holiday
between Christmas and Easter.
There is nothing good in there now.
Amanda

2.  Dear God,
Thank you for the baby brother
but what I asked for was a puppy.
I never asked for anything before.
You can look it up.
Joyce

3.  Dear Mr.
God,
I wish you would not make it so easy
for people to come apart
I had to have 3 stitches and a shot.
Janet

4.  God,
I read the bible.
What does beget mean?
Nobody will tell me.
Love Alison

5.  Dear God,
how did you know you were God?
Who told you?
Charlene

6.  Dear God,
is it true my father
won’t get in Heaven
if he uses his golf words in the house?
Anita

7.  Dear God,
I bet it’s very hard for you
to love all of everybody in the whole world.
There are only 4 people in our family
and I can never do it.
Nancy

8.  Dear God,
I like the story about Noah
the best of all of them.
You really made up some good ones.
I like walking on water, too.
Glenn

9.  Dear God,
my Grandpa says you were around
when he was a little boy.
How far back do you go?
Love, Dennis

10.  Dear God,
do you draw the lines around the countries?
If you don’t, who does?
Nathan

11.  Dear God,
did you mean for giraffes
to look like that or was it an accident?
Norma

12.  Dear God,
in bible times,
did they really talk that fancy?
Jennifer

13.  Dear God,
how come you did all those miracles
in the old days and don’t do any now?
Billy

14.  Dear God,
please send Dennis Clark
to a different summer camp this year.
Peter

15.  Dear God,
maybe Cain and Abel
would not kill each other so much
if they each had their own rooms.
It works out OK with me and my brother.
Larry

16.  Dear God,
I keep waiting for spring,
but it never did come yet.
What’s up?  Don’t forget.
Mark

17.  Dear God,
my brother told me about
how you are born
but it just doesn’t sound right.
What do you say?
Marsha

18.  Dear God,
if you watch in Church on Sunday
I will show you my new shoes.
Barbara

19.  Dear God,
is Reverend Coe a friend of yours,
or do you just know him through the business?
Donny

20.  Dear God,
I do not think anybody
could be a better God than you.
Well, I just want you to know that.
I am not just saying that because
you are already God.
Charlesv

21.  Dear God,
it is great the way you always
get the stars in the right place.
Why can’t you do that with the moon?
Jeff

22.  Dear God,
I am doing the best I can.
Really !!!!
Frank

And, saving the best for last   .

23.  Dear God,
I didn’t think orange went with purple
until I saw the sunset
you made on Tuesday night.
That was really cool.
Thomas

[NOTE FROM JIMMY: Actually, my personal favorite was #20, but the sunset one obviously impressed the anonymous author of the list more. #2 and #5 were personal favorites as well.]