Three Days To Never: The Interview

Threedaystonever_1

Tim Powers’ new novel,
Three Days To Never
(3DTN), is a supernatural thriller about spies,
magic, science, religion, and the secret history of the 20th
century. Set in 1987 during that year’s famed three-day New Age “Harmonic
Convergence,” the story involves Albert Einstein, Charlie Chaplin,
Israeli intelligence, remote viewers, the Qabbalah, the nature of time,
identity, and free will–and an unsuspecting English teacher from San
Bernardino and his young daughter.

The author has graciously consented
to give JimmyAkin.Org an exclusive interview about his new book.

* * *

JA.O: Authors usually dread the
question “Where do you get your ideas?” so I won’t ask that, but
I’d like to ask about the starting point for 3DTN. Where did the germ
of this novel come from? What was the first thing that you decided about
it? Did you want to write about a specific theme, a specific moment,
a specific character, a specific concept?

Tim Powers: Actually
it all started simply by me being curious about why Einstein’s hair
is white in all photographs after 1928. Biographies note that he had
something like a heart attack at that time, in the Swiss Alps, but I
was in my writer-paranoid mode, so I wasn’t buying the heart-attack
story.

      I
suppose anybody’s biography would yield the sort of clues I look for
to base a story on — I bet I could find them in a biography of Louisa
May Alcott, or Beatrix Potter! — but I was pleased to find that Einstein’s
life was particularly full of odd bits. He really did devote years to
working on some kind of "maschinchen," little machine, which
apparently in real life came to nothing, and he did go to a séance
with Charlie Chaplin, and he did leave California forever on the day
of the big Long Beach earthquake, for instance.

      I
always simply note lots of interesting bits and then try to figure out
what sort of story they appear to be part of — as opposed to having
a story in mind in advance and then looking for substantiation for it.
And so when I found that Einstein was devoted to the state of Israel,
for instance, and donated lots of his papers to a university there,
I just noted that Israel would probably figure in the story. That led
me to the Qabbalah and the Mossad, and then they led me on to lots of
other colorful stuff.

* * *

I know that your stories
are heavily researched. How did you go about researching this one?

      Well,
I read a good dozen biographies of Einstein! Underlining and cross-referencing
and making customized indexes on the flyleaves! (I always wind up wrecking
my research books.) And I read heaps too on Qabbalah, and the history
of Israel, and Charlie Chaplin, and old Hollywood, as the Einstein biographies
pointed toward these things.

      And
since the story’s action was mostly taking place within an hour’s drive
of where I live, my wife and I were able (as usually we’re not) to go
to the places I was writing about, and take pictures and wander around
and make notes. Since I usually can’t go to the places I set my stories
in, I insist that it’s not necessary — but just between you and me,
it is a help!

* * *

3DTN involves
the Israeli intelligence service, the Mossad. How did you go about researching
them, and how close are the intelligence methods shown in the story
to the ones the Mossad used in the 1980s? Are you at liberty to tell
us or would you have to kill me and my blog readers if you said?

      The
actual Mossad is more efficient than the fictional agents I put in the
book — but moderately inefficient characters are more useful in fiction
and more interesting, I think, to read about. But the background and
methods I give them are accurate for the 1980s, assuming my research
books were accurate. I read Victor Ostrovsky’s By Way of Deception
, and Gordon Thomas’s Gideon’s Spies, and Israel’s Secret
Wars
by Black and Morris, and several more. Taken altogether they
probably gave me a plausible picture of the Mossad in the ’80s, and
plausibility is more crucial than strict accuracy. (And as you note,
precise accuracy in espionage matters might be dangerous!)

* * *

When I read your stories,
I’m often surprised to find out that things I thought you made up
actually came from real history. For example, in 3DTN there is an occult
group with ties to the Nazi Regime that I thought you likely made up
(though we know the Nazis were interested in the occult). There is also
a long-lost Charlie Chaplin film that I suspected was an invention of
yours. Yet when I checked online, I found both of these were real. Are
there other things buried in the novel that the reader might be surprised
to find came from history?

      Actually
a whole lot of it is real stuff — Einstein’s maschinchen for measuring
faint voltages, his pal who assassinated the Austrian premier in 1916,
the mid-movie interruption of the first screening of Chaplin’s City
Lights,
the "kidnap" and ransom of Chaplin’s dead body,
for instances. This is a result of me getting my story almost ready-made
by reading a whole lot of research stuff and noting the intriguing bits,
which I then only have to fit together into a plot. It’s much easier
to just find all this than to make it up!

* * *

One of the things that I
find fascinating about your work is the way that you mix real life with
fantasy. Like many of your novels, 3DTN is set in modern times. This
is different than many fantasy novels, which are set in either the Middle
Ages or an imaginary period that is meant to be like the Middle Ages.
Personally, except in the case of someone like Tolkien, I often find
those stories coming across as flat or artificial. Is there a specific
reason why you weave magic around modern settings instead of going with
the traditional "sword and sorcery" type of fantasy? Is it
just a personal preference or do you think there are advantages to writing
magical tales set in the present day?

      Well,
I want to trick my readers into believing, while they’re reading the
book at least,  that all this stuff is really happening, to real
people. If I set it in that default-medieval world, with wizards and
Dark Lords, readers would probably think, "Oh, an imaginary story!"
and I don’t want them noticing that it is, in fact, imaginary.
So I put the magical stuff in alongside TVs and freeways and Marlboros,
and hope that when the magical business starts up, it will seem to be
as genuine as … you know,  the internet and streetlights and
Big Macs.

      Ideally
my readers will develop a bit of reflexive mistrust of apparent, mundane
reality! You really don’t have to nudge readers very hard to elicit
this. People say things like, "I’m not scared of ghosts, I’m scared
of urban gangs and nuclear war," but if they’re all alone in a
house at night, and they hear a scraping sound down the hall, they don’t
think it’s an urban gang member; for at least a moment or two they
know
it’s a ghost.

* * *

Elements of your own life
are often mixed into your stories. Your characters often live in the
same town that you do, and incidents in the stories are often modeled
on things that happened to you. For example, in your story
“The Bible Repairman,” you have a character who accidentally set
afire a Jehovah’s Witness Bible, just as you once did. Can you tell
us some elements of your own life that found their way into 3DTN?

      I
think most writers use their own lives as the basic kit for their protagonists,
to be altered as plot might require. It’s easier! You know the (ideally
mildly interesting) details of your own life pretty thoroughly, and
so a protagonist based on yourself is going to have a history, and tastes,
and even such flaws as you might be aware of having.

      I
don’t have a daughter, and my wife fortunately is still alive! But Marrity’s
house is our house, and his furniture and books and cats and pickup
truck are all ours. (Our pickup truck was a lot newer when he had it
in ’87 than it is now.) And I quit drinking some years ago, which I
think might be a wise course for Marrity.

* * *

Last year you visited Israel
for a science fiction convention. Visiting Israel was a very powerful
experience for me, and I wonder how it affected you. What did you think
about your trip and did getting to go there influence 3DTN in any way?

      Unfortunately
my wife and I went to Israel after I had finished the book! I
did manage to shove a few first-hand details about Tel Aviv into the
book, at least. And the real-life Israel didn’t contradict the Israel
I had imagined — I expected it to be a wonderful place, with admirable
people, and it was certainly that.

      And
we did get to Jerusalem, several times! As Catholics, we found that
was kind of comprehension overload — the realization that God walked
right here, and according to tradition touched this particular stone,
and died right here, is just disorienting. You only begin to appreciate
it later, in pieces.

      We
definitely want to go back. Ideally we’d go every year, with the tax
excuse of attending the convention!

* * *

Your previous novel,
Declare, had significant Catholic themes in it, while 3DTN has significant
Jewish themes. Specifically, it has a magical system related to the
Qabbalah of Jewish mysticism. Why did you decide to go that way this
time? It’s not just that you’re a huge Madonna fan or something is
it?

Well, no. What I generally do in my books, once I’ve got a situation
figured out, is look for the supernatural tradition most closely associated
with it — so that with pirates in the Caribbean I used voodoo [in the novel On Stranger Tides–ja], and
with Arabs I used genies [in the novel Declare–ja].   Declare was fun, in that one of the
historical characters’ uneasy fascination with Catholicism gave me an
excuse to present Catholicism as true. In this new book, I guess I present
Judaism as true! That Mossad character is a fairly orthodox Jew, and
isn’t comfortable using Qabbalah.

      And
Judaism isn’t alien to Catholics, of course — I always figure that
if Catholicism were somehow, per impossibile, proved wrong, I’d
jump straight into Judaism.

* * *

One of the ways that you
ground your stories in real life is by weaving science and magic closely
together. It’s not uncommon in your stories to have quantum mechanical
explanations for magic, or ghosts explained as a partly electrical phenomena,
or devices that are part technology and part enchantment. Depending
on how it’s handled, I could see this either helping or hurting a
story. What have you found to be the benefits and
risks of closely juxtaposing science and magic?

      One
way it helps — I hope! — in soliciting reader credulity is that it
shows magic impinging on, participating in, reality as we know it. After
all, if you can see a thing, then it’s reflecting light, and so it must
have some physical properties! And I like to give magical phenomena
a quantum or Newtonian or relativistic structure, just because those
have internal consistency and I hope my magical stuff will therefore
have a plausible consistency. I don’t want readers to think that I’m
free to make up any old magical effects at all.

      The
risk of this, of course, is that you’ll make magic into just another
technology — pentagrams are effective up to such-and-such amount of
stress, the effectiveness of magic spells diminishes as the square of
the distance — you risk losing the numinous, vertiginous qaulity which
is really the whole point of magic. Real magic should be as scary as
an earthquake, even if it’s "good" magic.

* * *

H. P. Lovecraft felt strongly
that a weird fiction story should be thoroughly grounded in reality
and contain only a single supernatural element—the
“wonder” at the heart of the story. Your approach is different:
You strongly ground your stories in the real world but you weave in
multiple supernatural elements. It’s like there is a whole magical
subtext bubbling just under the surface of daily life. Do you think
Lovecraft was too conservative about how much of the supernatural readers
can accept or are there special challenges to pulling off
the kind of thing that you do?

      Well
I suppose I’d claim that I’m only introducing one magical element, but
that it’s got lots of apparently-unconnected side effects! — but that
would probably be more glib than true.

      Yes,
I think Lovecraft was too conservative. The thing we want to show the
reader is that there’s a whole world of unsuspected stuff going on —
when Leeuwenhoek first looked into his microscope, he didn’t see just
one weird new creature, but dozens of them! The unsuspected world will
have its internal consistencies, its own possibilities and impossibilities,
but it’s gonna be intricate.

* * *

Albert Einstein figures
prominently in 3DTN and you go beyond the known facts of his life in
working him into the story’s background. Einstein is such an iconic
figure that many authors have felt the liberty to fictionalize his life
in books and movies, but just recently we’ve had a great deal of criticism
directed toward Dan Brown for his rewriting the facts of Jesus’ life
in
The Da Vinci Code, and Jesus is
an even more iconic figure. A lot of people took offense at what Brown
did, but a lot don’t take offense at a fictional version of Einstein’s
life. How do you explain this and, in your view, how much liberty should
authors have when fictionalizing the lives of historical figures?

      I
think the main thing is to base your characterization on what’s known
of the real historical figure — don’t have him do things he never would
have done. You can invent lots of unrecorded motivations for him, but
he should react to those in character.

      I
like to think I presented Einstein as an admirable character, which
he appears mostly to have been. I’ve portrayed some historical bad guys
somewhat sympathetically — Bugsy Siegel, for example [in the novel Last Call–ja] — but I don’t
think readers mind that as much as going the other way, and portraying
revered figures as villains. Brown portrayed Jesus as a fairly vague
nonentity, but at least he didn’t make Him a bad guy!

* * *

Despite the emphasis on
reality, your stories often have striking elements of whimsy. For example,
some of your characters have joke names—and joke names based on ecclesiastical
Latin at that! In a couple of your novels there was a character named
“Neal Obstadt”
(nihil obstat;
“nothing obstructs”) and in 3DTN there’s a woman going by the
name “Libra Nosamalo”
(libera nos a malo;
“deliver us from evil”). Is there a risk of harming suspension of
disbelief here or do you think that the payoff in humor is enough for
those who’ll get the joke?

      Well,
I think there is a risk of harming suspension of disbelief, yes. I shouldn’t
do it! Anything that reminds the reader that he’s just sitting in a chair
holding a stack of papers all glued together at one edge, and not in
the presence of the book’s characters, is a mistake, even if it gets
a laugh.

      It
could be worse! After all, Neal Obstadt may have picked that name because
of its associations, and Libra Nosamalo explains that her parents had
an odd sense of humor.

      But
the best sort of humor in a book is things that arise naturally from
the action, things a reader can laugh at without stepping outside the
story!

* * *

Compared to many contemporary
novels, yours are fairly clean. While they’re meant for adults, they
aren’t loaded up with sex scenes and they don’t celebrate sin. There
are cuss words and your characters definitely have things they’d need
to talk about in confession, but on a deeper level your books presuppose
a moral structure to the universe. As a Catholic, how do you find the
balance between showing the reality of man’s fallen condition and
glorifying evil the way we commonly see in the media?

      Well,
while I show people doing bad things — even show the atractiveness
of doing bad things! — I like to think I show too that they work out
badly, and that the characters would have been way better off not having
done those things. Often a character wants to do the difficult right
thing but keep a couple of pet sins too — just little ones, they don’t
eat a lot or make much noise! And I hope I show that there’s bad consequences
of that. I always remember Lewis’s statement in The Great Divorce,
something like, "If we choose Heaven we will not be able to keep
even the smallest and most intimate souvenirs of Hell."

      This
is really more craft than morality — given, I suppose, my own beliefs.
Sex-scenes, for example, I think are generally just bad craft. They
usually feel to me like clumsy gear-changes, jolting the reader abruptly
from one sort of fiction into another. Not smooth carpentry!

* * *

J. R. R. Tolkien’s works
envision a world that differs from ours in a number of respects. Some
things are “okay” in his world that would not be okay in ours (e.g.,
Gandalf’s use of magic). C. S. Lewis’s

Chronicles of Narnia are similar. When reading or watching science
fiction and fantasy, I often imagine that I’m peeking in on a universe
where God established different rules (which is certainly his right),
but many people feel that there are limits to what authors should portray
in this regard. A considerable number of Christians feel that J. K.
Rowling crossed the line in her

Harry Potter series and created a world that could tempt real-world
children toward the occult. In your novels I’ve noticed that the more
people chase after magic, the more they get burned by it. Where do you
come down on this topic? Are there limits to how different an author
should make the world he envisions? Does it depend on the audience?
What are the boundaries?

      I
make magic a damaging thing for characters to mess with just because
that feels logical and convincing to me. I’d be writing about a fake
magic — fake to me, anyway — if I made it benevolent or even neutral.

      But
I wouldn’t advise a writer who sees magic as a nice thing to
try to change the way he deals with it! I don’t think you can fake these
things. I’ve known writers who try in their stories to endorse moral
correctnesses they don’t actually care about, or which they even feel
to be invalid, just to make their work more palatable to perceived readers’
tastes, and it never works. Your fiction is going to reflect what you
actually believe and don’t believe, and it’d be a mistake for Rowling,
for example, to vilify magic just because people think it ought to be
vilified. They may be right and she may be wrong, but it’s her eyes
we’re looking through when we experience the story.

      Joan
Didion said that "art is hostile to ideology." Fiction
can
be educational and beneficial and improving, but that’s not
one of its jobs!

* * *

Your stories often begin
after the death of an important character—frequently a female character whose
death sets the plot in motion. Is this a consequence of writing stories
that often involve ghosts, is it just a good place to begin stories,
or is it a personal trademark?

      I
guess it’s just a personal quirk! I really wasn’t aware of it till you
pointed it out. I guess it’s a natural way to get into a dramatic situation
— the reader learns about this deleted person from seeing how the other
characters react to her (generally her) sudden absence, and when a mystery
becomes evident she’s not there to explain it, and they’ve got to try
to reconstruct what she secretly knew or what she was actually up to.

      And
yes, in stories of mine her ghost is likely to show up and have some
comments!

* * *

Your stories often end with
the creation of new families by characters who aren’t initially part
of the same family. Is this a crypto pro-family statement that you’re
trying to get across, does it play a specific
dramatic function, or is it something that you just find interesting?

      I
suppose it plays a dramatic function, in that it’s putting together
a new orderliness, with optimistic promise, out of the ruins of what
had been there before the story’s catastrophes started. Like, "Things
won’t be the same, but they’ll be nice in a different way." And
I generally get fond of my characters, and I want them to have nice
lives after the book’s spotlight isn’t on them anymore!

* * *

Your previous novel,
Declare, came out in 2001 and 3DTN has come out in 2006. You’re
not going to make us wait until 2011 for another Tim Powers novel are
you?

      I
hope not! No, no, definitely not. This one was slowed down by me teaching
two high school classes and one or two college classes every semester,
and I’m going to cut back on that, I swear.

* * *

ORDER THREE DAYS TO NEVER–OR OTHER WORKS BY TIM POWERS–FROM JIMMY AKIN’S STORE.

SDG who?

Yes, the red name above isn’t Jimmy, Michelle, or Tim J. In a rare foray from guest-blogging limbo, I’ve returned to… share some pictures from my summer vacation.

Wait! Come back! Don’t worry, I’m not talking about a slide show of My Trip to the Grand Canyon or anything like that. It’s just that last week, vacationing in North Carolina, I contributed an entry to a sand sculpture contest — and won — and, given the subject matter, I thought Jimmy’s readers might like to see the results.


See more pictures.

Granted, on this particular blog, graced as it is from time to time with Tim J’s stunning artwork, my summer-day diversion isn’t as impressive as it might somewhere else, but still, I’m pretty pleased with the results.

This was my first complete crucifixion sculpture; last year I made a couple of unfinished studies that gave me the confidence to tackle this project in spite of having only 75 minutes to do it in before the contest judging.

(The conditions weren’t ideal… The tide was high and rising; the time to sculpt sand is when the tide is receding, which allows the best access to wet sand. For awhile I wasn’t even going to enter the contest, but eventually I decided to give it a try, and was pleasantly surprised at how well the relatively dry sand above the tide line handled.)

In previous years, I’ve done sharks, crocodiles, mermaids and sea serpents.

Well, that’s all I have to say about that, so… see you next summer!

In The Mail

Saints_behaving_badlyI recently received an advance copy of a book called Saints Behvaing Badly by Thomas Craughwell and I’ll offer my thoughts on it soon, after I’ve had a chance to go through it.

The book looks at the human side of saints–the side that is often diminished or dimmed in pious saint stories.

The fact is that the saints were often human, all too human as the phrase goes, and while some might consider it impious to point this out (and while it would be impious to dwell on it obsessively), it also can be inspirational to realize that the saints were indeed imperfect but nevertheless were able to overcome and display heroic virtue.

In that sense, looking at the imperfections of the saints can play a useful and encouraging role for those of us whose salvation is not yet won.

In the meantime,

CHECK OUT THE BOOK.

Three Days To Never

ThreedaystoneverI finished Tim Powers’ new book, Three Days To Never, and I really liked it!

The story centers on a mild mannered English teacher (patterned after Tim himself) and his young daughter. The year is 1987, and the New Age "Harmonic Convergence" of that year is underway. The New Agers come in for a good bit of ribbing from various characters in the novel but–unbeknownst to anybody, including the New Agers themselves–the event causes a slight disruption of world affairs in a hidden, unseen way.

While that’s happening in the background, the English teacher and his daughter are trying to make sense out of a family tragedy: The teacher’s creepy grandmother has just died, leaving him a creepy and mysterious message about what she did and what can be found in the "Kaleidoscope shed" out back of her house.

Y’know, the kind of shed where you carve your initials into the wooden wall and then later they aren’t there?

When they enter the shed, the teacher and his daughter find that the grandmother used the shed to hold TV, a VCR, a video cassette of Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure, and a plaster block with the hand and footprints of Charlie Chaplin, which she stole from in front of Hollywood’s Chinese Theater. What do they have in common? What was she using them for? Why does the teacher’s long-lost father show up after so many years? How does Albert Einstein fit into all this? Why is the Israeli intelligence service–the Mossad–so interested in what’s happening? How about the rival group that used to have ties to Hitler? Or the blind assassin? And what about all those babies lying in the snow, waving their arms and legs for a few seconds before they mysteriously vanish?

To find out the answers to these questions, you’ll have to

GET THE BOOK!

(Incidentally, you’ll note that I’ve linked to a page in my new store, where you can buy other of Tim’s books, as well as other fine quality works.)

I found that the book was a very quick and enjoyable read for me. The plot proceeds at a swift pace, and there are nice elements of humor and irony as we proceed to keep a sense of whimsy in what is, essentially, a supernatural spy thriller.

Once I got past some of the major plot point (which I won’t spoil here), I found the book contained a very powerful statement about free will. I found myself liking and appreciating the characters, even the ones who weren’t on the right side (some of them, anyway), and about at least some points in the novel, I found myself contemplating, "Just how much of this goes on in real life?"

So: This book is enthusiastically recommended! Don’t miss it!

Now a few notes:

1) For those who have already read it, please keep the spoilers to a minimum in the combox. We don’t want to give away any of the big surprises (none of which I’ve touched) and spoil people’s fun.

2) Content advisory: Infrequent occurrence of a few cuss words and
one scene where a woman thinks back about her sexual history, but no
on-screen activity.

3) Stay tuned, because later this week I’ll be running an interview that Tim Powers graciously consented to give exclusively to the readers of JA.O!

4) Since I’m putting this up on Labor Day, it’ll be my only post for the day. Order the book and then go have fun!

Memento Mori

Francis_1

"Remember, O man, that you are dust and to dust you shall return." –Ash Wednesday liturgy

A few weeks ago, Jimmy mentioned the unexpected death of a friend. This person was also a friend of mine and a colleague here at Catholic Answers. Let’s call him T. Although T. had been ill for quite a while, his death came as an unexpected shock. I had known him for over five years and had worked closely with him for several of them. His death was particularly difficult for me since he and I had had a couple of meetings earlier in the week before he died and it was stunning that it seemed that he was there one day and gone the next.

In the weeks following T.’s funeral, another colleague who was quite close to T. was allowed by T.’s survivors to go through T.’s apartment and collect any religious items that he thought might find a good home with Catholic Answers’ staff members. When the announcement was made that the items were available in the library for the taking, I hotfooted it over to see if I could find something by which to remember T.

What caught my eye immediately was a large handsomely-framed print of the painting you see on the left side of this post.  (You can click on the image to enlarge it.)  To me, it appeared to be a monk holding a jar. Since it was a rather large picture, I wasn’t sure if I wanted it but I took it back to my office to decide. I figured that I could always return it to the library if need be.

The back of the print said that it was a painting of St. Francis of Assisi by the seventeenth-century Spanish painter Francisco de Zurbaran, a master from Spain’s Golden Age. A colleague in the next office who came over to look at it pointed out that St. Francis wasn’t holding a jar; he was holding a skull! Right away then I knew that this was a painting from the memento mori genre, an artistic genre in which the subjects are intended to remind the viewer of death.

Some research on the painting revealed that De Zurbaran was very interested in the memento mori genre and did more than one painting of his namesake saint contemplating death.

CLICK HERE FOR IMAGES.

It might seem strange to think of St. Francis of Assisi contemplating death.  In the popular imagination, he is a happy-go-lucky friar who liked to preach to birds and commune with nature.  In the minds of some, he might even be considered a prototype for the radical Sixties hippies.  But St. Francis himself would not have considered it strange for an artist to portray him in such a seemingly "morbid" manner.

"May Thou be praised, my Lord, for our sister, bodily death,
whom no man living can escape.
Woe to those who die in mortal sin:
blessed those whom she will find in Thy most holy desires,
because the second death will do them no evil."

The quote above is taken from St. Francis’s Canticle of Brother Sun.

Once I realized what I had, my decision was made. There could be no more significant memento of T., one that would remind me of him and remind me of the ephemeral nature of this life and the need to be always prepared for the next.

Please take a few moments and pray for the repose of T.’s soul and for the final perseverance of all who will die today.

"Watch therefore, for you do not know on what day your Lord is coming. … Therefore you also must be ready; for the Son of Man is coming at an hour you do not expect" (Matt. 24:42, 44).

Stargate X-Treme!

XtremeI recently discovered that iTunes has this season’s episodes of Stargate SG1 available for download, so when I realized that I’d missed the TV airing of the 200th episode, I thought, "Man, I don’t want to wait for the DVDs on that one; I ought to download it!"

So I did.

WOW!

That has to be the most . . . what’s the term? . . . psychedelic? . . . parody-filled? . . . loony? . . . oh, heck, I don’t know. But it was the most SOMETHING episode ever.

The 200th episode–titled "200" (a number they give a meaning to within the episode itself)–is a sequel to the show’s 100th episode, which was not titled "100" but "Wormhole X-Treme!", which hilariously parodied not only Stargate SG1 itself but also the way the cable TV industry works.

This time, they go beyond that, doing parodies of, well . . .

1) Stargate SG1 itself,

2) Stargate SG1 parodying itself as Wormhole X-Treme,

3) The TV industry,

4) The movie industry,

5) Detective shows

6) Stupid efforts to revamp shows to make them younger and hipper

7) Star Wars,

8) Star Trek,

9) Farscape,

10) The Wizard of Oz, and . . . and . . .

11) a parody of something that is so BIZARRE that I’m not even going to tell you what it is so that it won’t spoil the surprise.

The last of these involves a re-envisioning of SG1’s origin that, once again, has a tongue-in-cheek return of the absolute WORST, MOST HORRIBLE, OVER-THE-TOP line EVER written in Stargate history. It originally appeared in the pilot episode and was delivered by (then) Capt. Samantha Carter. The actress who plays her–Amanda Tapping–complained so much about the line that now whenever we see an alternate version of the team’s origin (whether in another timeline or whatever) they bring back the line to mock how horrible it was.

They also (sorta) fulfill the promise to let us finally see the missing "Fifth Race," the Furlings–who we learned existed back in Season 1 and have never seen even though we’re now in Season 10. (Personally, I’m disappointed with what they did on this one, though it was funny, and I hope they fix it before the end of the current–and last–season.)

This episode, for fans of the series, is simply amazing. The amount of parody crammed into it is stunning, and they even managed to pull off a thoughtful ending (pictured, believe it or not, above).

Now, for those of you who missed the episode and don’t have iTunes . . . YouTube to the rescue!

This has to be one of the most heavily YouTubed TV episodes of a show ever, and–in fact–it seems you can watch the whole thing via YouTube:

PART ONE / PART TWO / PART THREE / PART FOUR / PART FIVE

Final Holdouts Now Surrendering To Pod People

A piece back I decided I wanted to listen to some songs by the Beatles, so I went to the iTunes music store and typed in their name. Know how many songs were available for download?

Absolutely none.

The Beatles, y’see, (technically, Apple Corps, which is responsible for looking after their copyrights) has not allowed their music to be made available for download.

So I just got the songs I wanted on CD and ripped them.

This is not the first time the Beatles have been behind the technological curve. They were also one of the last bands to make their work available on CD.

C’mon, guys! Don’t stay stuck in the ’60s!

The Beatles, however, are not the only big-name act that hasn’t wanted to allow its fans to be able to (legally) download its music. Others include Bob Seger, Led Zeppelin, Metallica, Garth Brooks, and Kid Rock.

But the times, they are a-changin’!

The number of pod people out there has now become so vast that these last few holdouts are starting to recognize that their struggle is futile, and they are beginning to surrender.

Bob Seger and Metallica have now joined the revolution, and the writing is on the wall for the rest of them:

But bands can no longer risk losing out on sales and marketing generated from the digital formats, especially on iTunes, said Phil Leigh, an analyst with Inside Digital Media, a market research firm. With CD sales continuing to drop, it’s only a matter of time until the last holdouts give up, he said.

GET THE STORY.

So, special message for the Beatles . . .  YOU’RE NEXT!

Well, This Isn’t A Total Surprise

FROM SCI-FI WIRE:

SG-1 Ends Run; Atlantis Back

SCI FI Channel confirmed that it will not renew its record-breaking original series Stargate SG-1 for another season, but will pick up its spinoff series Stargate Atlantis for a fourth year. SG-1 aired its 200th episode on Aug. 18, and the SF series is the longest-running SF show on American television.

SCI FI issued the following statement on Aug. 21: "SCI FI Channel is proud to be the network that brought Stargate SG-1 to its record-breaking 10th season. Ten seasons and 215 episodes is an astounding, Guinness World Record-setting accomplishment. Stargate is a worldwide phenomenon. Having achieved so much over the course of the past 10 years, SCI FI believes that the time is right to make this season their last on the channel. SCI FI is honored to have been part of the Stargate legacy for five years, and we look forward to continuing to explore the Stargate universe with our partners at MGM through a new season of Stargate Atlantis."

Stargate SG-1, developed for television by executive producers Brad Wright and Jonathan Glassner, is based on the 1994 feature film Stargate. SG-1, which originally starred Richard Dean Anderson, Michael Shanks, Amanda Tapping and Christopher Judge, began on Showtime, then moved to SCI FI after five seasons. The current cast includes Tapping, Shanks and Judge and newcomers Ben Browder, Claudia Black and Beau Bridges. It airs Fridays at 9 p.m. ET/PT [SOURCE].

CHT to the reader who e-mailed.

I’m sorry to see SG1 go, but it’s quality hasn’t been as high the last few years. I’m impressed with how well they did after Richard Dean Anderson MacGuyvered his way out of the program. The introduction this season of Vala (sp?) as a regular character was a breath of fresh air, but SG1 hasn’t been able to motivate me to tune in each week for some time (couldn’t compete with square dancing), so I’ve been catching reruns and plan on watching the last couple of seasons complete on DVD.

I’m glad that they’re keeping Atlantis around, though I don’t think that show has ever equalled SG1 when the latter was at its peak. The writing has always seemed muted, somehow, though I love the character Rodney MacKay (sp?). Perhaps with SG1 off the air, Atlantis will take off and grow the way DS9 did once TNG and B5 were off the air. The departure of the latter two shows gave DS9 the ability to cut loose and spread its wings without cramping other series, and perhaps with the whole Stargate universe to itself now, Atlantis will be able to tell stories without having to worry about stepping on SG1’s toes.

I’d be interested to see what the ratings have been for SG1 vs. Atlantis. I suspect that SG1’s are higher, but this wasn’t purely a ratings-based situation. The SG1 writers have been having a hard time making do, between franchise aging and the departure of major cast members. It does make creative sense to end the series before its scraping the bottom of the barrel (which I personally don’t think it’s at; I can imagine sci-fi a LOT worse than the current season of SG1).

There’s also something that the above press-release doesn’t mention:

This is a repositioning of where the network is putting its money. A cable network only has so much money to devote to developing new proramming, and there are only so many serieses that Sci-Fi can produce at a given time. So a major reason SG1 is being put out to pasture is to make way for a new series: Caprica. The Battlestar Galactica franchise has been so successful (it WAS able to get me to tune in weekly last season) that the network is wanting more in that mold. So what we’re watching is a pirouette between the two franchises, with the young, dynamic Galactica series taking the lead over the still-watchable but somewhat-worn-around-the-edges Stargate franchise.

It would be impolitic to say such things in a press release announcing the end of SG1, though.

Wouldn’t sit well with Stargate fans to say "We can’t produce an extra new series each week, so SG1 is going away to allow us to do Caprica."

That wasn’t the only reason for the decision, of course. The ones mentioned above were, too, and ratings decline certainly was as well. But Caprica’s arrival no doubt played a role.

In The Mail

Jigsaw_nationBack in November 2004 there was a lot of talk about the division of the U.S. into clear zones of "red" and "blue" states leading to secession. The talk was tongue-in-cheek, of course, but it was occurring in significantly different social circles.

We talked about that on the blog here, here, and here.

The last of those is a link to a post I did about some folks at the SF (Speculative Fiction) Readers Forum who were talking about the idea of blue state secession–who also linked our discussion here on the blog–and darn if they didn’t go and do something about it.

Mind you, they didn’t start a secessionist movement (as far as I know), but being speculative fiction enthusiasts, they went and wrote a book of short stories exploring the possibility.

Since we’d linked them before, the editor sent me a review copy, and I just got it in the mail.

I’ll let y’all know what I think once I’ve had a chance to read a few of the stories. I’m guessing that they’ll tend to have a more bluestate perspective on things in the main, but that won’t (or shouldn’t) prevent them from being well-written, interesting stories. (If it does, I’ll let y’all know.)

In the meantime,

CHECK
IT OUT.

On Mary, Kolbe and Suffering for Your Art

Immhtfin2_2I was in good spirits Monday, as I drove to the local community college. I had received word a few weeks before that I would be teaching some classes there in the fall, and was on my way to sign my employment contract. The job seemed ideal. It would provide me with a solid, steady income, yet leave me a good deal of free time to work at my fine art projects, especially the religious and liturgical art that I hoped to pursue.

It had been a grindingly long year, as my art income had been spotty, and this new job promised to ease things considerably. I had applied for several positions, and tried to drum up as much freelance business as I could, but we had slowly and continually lost ground. Maybe now I wouldn’t have to worry about stopping at Sonic occasionally to buy the kids a milk shake. We could buy a few clothes, perhaps even replace my old Dodge Neon next year.

While driving, I tuned in to the local Catholic radio station. It was the feast day of St. Maximilian Kolbe, and I listened as the hosts and guests discussed Kolbe’s spirituality. Standing out in my mind was  Kolbe’s understanding that any apostolate goes through three stages; preparation, the apostolate itself, and then the suffering that makes the apostolate fruitful. I considered that my new focus on liturgical art could be understood as an apostolate, and I looked back on how God might have prepered me for it, how I felt that He called me to it, and how we had even suffered financially, somewhat. I quickly decided that, though it had been a rough several months, I really couldn’t call it suffering… not in the big scheme of things… especially in comparison to the suffering of saints like Maximilian Kolbe. Nonetheless, I was happy and relieved to have my new teaching position.

Tomorrow would be the Feast of the Assumption, and we (me, my wife Martha, and kids) would attend the vigil mass at our parish that night. It would be a great opportunity to offer thanks for my new job. It also happened to be the day that I finished, and officially signed, my first real liturgical art piece, an Immaculate Heart image, in the classical realist style that I have happily, even gratefully, settled into over the last few years. I had prayed for some time about this new direction in my art and had decided to paint the Immaculate Heart as a way of expressing my new devotion to the Blessed Mother, as well as to ask her blessing on all my artwork, especially any religious pieces. Finishing the piece just as we would be celebrating Mary’s assumption was very gratifying and meant a great deal to me.

Overall, it was a day of milestones. Everything seemed steeped in significance.

I arrived early to sign my contract, and so decided to drop in and visit for a minute with the head of the art department. She had someone in her office, but looked up and greeted me, introducing me to her guest, another art instructor. Then she said "Did you get my message?".

"No", I replied. My cell phone had been in need of a charge.

"Oh… well, I’m sorry…" she began, "but I’m afraid we had to take away your classes." She went on to explain that class enrollment had not been as heavy as they had anticipated, and that one teacher they thought would be gone had indeed decided to stay. My classes were needed for the full-time faculty already on board. She was apologetic. She had never had to do this before. Things just didn’t work out. She had tried to call me that morning to let me know that I did not need to come out to sign my contract.

I don’t mind telling you that I was numb. It was something like having the wind knocked out of me. I said some things about how it was okay, and to keep me in mind if something opened up. I said thanks, I think.

At mass that night, I was comforted by the readings, and was reminded that my trust is in God, and not in any created thing. Had I put too much stock in this job, and lost my focus on Christ? If my priorities had been straight, would I have been so deeply stunned and disappointed? It wasn’t really a time to look for easy answers, though, more a time to lay everything before Christ and to trust in his providence. A time, also, to petition the Blessed Virgin and ask for her prayers.

So now the painting above takes on, for me, even more significance. I had thought for some weeks that in this new venture into liturgical art, I would be working with a net – so to speak. I am now, once again, working without a net.

And so comes the shameless plug. The photo above is a rather poor digital camera snapshot of my Immacualte Heart oil painting. The original is 18 x 24 inches, and is on wood panel. The model is a lovely lady from my parish, who condescended to pose for me. I have high quality prints of the original available in a variety of sizes which are appropriate for individuals or churches. The original is also for sale. If you like, you can find out more on MY WEBSITE.

I am also anxious (and this is the whole point, I guess) to execute more custom fine art pieces for churches that are in need of liturgical or devotional artwork. I will be happy to consider murals, as well. I pray that this piece is only the beginning of a fruitful career providing very high quality artwork that will be truly edifying to Catholic worship and devotion, both public and private. My art is informed by very traditional sensibilities, but is executed in a way that I hope is powerful and fresh.

I covet your prayers. If you have read this far… God bless you!