Egyptian Conservationists Fight To Protect Dwindling Mummy Population

From The Onion (yes! apparently they do manage to write something clean once in a while!) . . .

Mummies
CAIRO—As the sun sets over Cairo, the streets are eerily quiet. Just a few years ago, the hillsides from Luxor to Giza would have been buzzing with the familiar sounds of tomb doors creaking open and bones snapping under the methodical shuffling of a slow, catatonic gait. But the telltale signs of Egypt’s indigenous mummy population have fallen silent recently, and the fearsome creatures that once lurched freely across the Valley of the Kings are disappearing at an alarming rate. If nothing is done, experts say, the Egyptian mummy will soon go the way of the Bavarian lycanthrope or the Transylvanian vampire, and vanish forever.

Afterlife Preservation Society president James Amarcas said he can recall a time when Egyptians did not have to go to a museum, but could look out their window and see an entire herd of shroud-wrapped forms staggering on missions of revenge.

"My grandchildren have still never seen a mummy," said Amarcas, who vividly recalls his first mummy sighting in 1947, when he was just 3 years old. "These terrible monsters are little more than a legend to them. It’s sad to think they might never see the bloodthirsty march of an undead Egyptian prince on a cool, calm night."

GET THE (HEARTBREAKING) STORY!

Somebody call Zahi Hawass!

Author: Jimmy Akin

Jimmy was born in Texas, grew up nominally Protestant, but at age 20 experienced a profound conversion to Christ. Planning on becoming a Protestant seminary professor, he started an intensive study of the Bible. But the more he immersed himself in Scripture the more he found to support the Catholic faith, and in 1992 he entered the Catholic Church. His conversion story, "A Triumph and a Tragedy," is published in Surprised by Truth. Besides being an author, Jimmy is the Senior Apologist at Catholic Answers, a contributing editor to Catholic Answers Magazine, and a weekly guest on "Catholic Answers Live."

19 thoughts on “Egyptian Conservationists Fight To Protect Dwindling Mummy Population”

  3. I understand the Cairo Zoo has initiated the Anck-Su-Namun breeding program to try to replenish the population. The difficulty is finding willing body donors for the Soul Replacement phase of the program.
    Some people have no sense of public-spiritedness.

  8. I love the Horoscopes on that site. Here is a sampling of one of them…of course some are not very clement.
    Scorpio October 24 – November 21
    Forty thousand years after you were cryogenically frozen, scientists will at last bring you back to life when they come up with a cure for stupidity.

  9. Mummy, Jimmy says dead people want to kill us, is it true?
    Sorry ’bout the lousy joke. :-3)
    Don’t worry, David B.
    MUM.‘s the word!

  12. Esau: Three Our Fathers and Three Hail Marys for that one!
    bill912,
    Considering just how bad that was, I think the entire rosary should be said! ;^)

  13. Jimmy, how come nothing on Our Lady of Guadalupe. I know you are on that immigration bandwagon, and it is not a day of obligation nor part of the deposit of the faith BUT a GREAT FEAST DAY. I expected a painting or link or post or something.

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