A reader writes:
I recall you reaffirming a week or two ago that the Church considers Protestant marriages valid, even in Protestant sects that recognize divorce and remarriage. Do you feel that at some time in the future the Church may reconsider this? I know that some consider the existance of a prenuptual agreement grounds to invalidate a marriage, since it means both spouses are acknowledging the possibility that the marriage may not be permanent. Would the Church ever consider the fact that Protestants and at least some Evangelicals, by reason of recognizing divorce and remarriage, transmit this feeling to the couple being married, thus creating the circumstances for invalidity?
When people say that the Church recognizes Protestant marriages, it doesn’t mean that all of them individually are valid. It means that it extends to them the same favor of the law that it extends to Catholic marriage: In other words, it assumes that they are valid until it is proven otherwise.
The presence of a pre-nuptial agreement does not of itself invalidate a marriage (Protestant or Catholic), though depending on what the pre-nuptual agreement says or the circumstances surrounding the agreement, it may show that one or both of the parties had an understanding of marriage sufficiently deficient that it prevented them from exchanging valid matrimonial consent, meaning that the marriage was invalid.
Because the Protestant understanding differs significantly from the Church’s understanding, there may (or may not) be a higher ratio of invalid Protstant marriages, but this is not certain. There are no statistics on this, so it would be conjecture to speculate one way or the other.
Nevertheless, many Protestant marriages, when examined by a Catholic marriage tribunal, are found to be invalid. This may occur, for example, when one of the parties to such a marriage has divorced and remarried and now wishes to enter the Catholic Church.
Thus the reader continues:
The reason I ask this is that I know of a number of non-Catholics who have divorced and remarried, and are now to one extent or another attracted by the Catholic faith. Their stumbling block is a fear that their previous marriages do not meet the requirements for invalidity. Without knowing all the facts, and with them not having consulted a priest, I recognize that it is almost impossible to offer an accurate opinion; nevertheless I do sympathize with their situation. Having said that, I also feel a degree of discomfort in continuing to try to bring them closer to the Church if I’m only leading them down a path toward disappointment. (I know they could, for example, choose to live in a chaste relationship, but for various reasons I don’t think that’s likely in these cases.)
At any rate, I’d welcome your advice as to how to take such situations into account when evangelizing to non-Catholics.
First, let’s deal with your on role here: You should evangelize these folks. Sharing the fullness of the teachings of Christ, which means sharing the Catholic faith, is what we are to be about. We cannot say that merely because someone is a fellow Christian he has "enough" of Christ’s teachings and should be left alone. Christ wants him to have all his teachings, and it is our job to try to facilitate that–in ways that are appropriate and charitable and not overly pushy. (Being overly pushy pushes people away from Christ.)
It is true that, if they move closer to the Church and have their marital statuses examined that it may be found they are in an invalid marriage at present. This may mean painful choices, such as living as brother and sister with the present "spouse," but God will give them the grace to deal with those choices–and he will give it to them at the time they need it. You should do your part (evangelize) and allow God to help them with the parts that you cannot help. Don’t worry. He’s got enough grace for everyone, and he will give it to them generously as they respond to him.
This then is the key to their situation: They should strive not to allow their worries about their marital situation to stand as a barrier between them and the true faith. They should pursue the truth, wherever it leads them, and trust God to give them the grace they need at the points they need it.
He will.
He’s promised to do so:
God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your
strength, but with the temptation will also provide the way of escape,
that you may be able to endure it [1 Cor. 10:13].
Jimmy,
When you say “living as brother and sister”, does that just mean they do not engage in the marital embrace, or should that be taken literaly and include any sort of romantic affection including stuff like cuddling up in front of the TV, hand holding and kissing?
Jimmy, I didn’t understand what you meant: If one or both spouses thought during their wedding that marriage isn’t indissolutable, is their marriage invalid?
I was speaking with an Greek Orthodox friend, and he said that the Greek Orthodox church allows up to 3 divorces and the use of contraception in marriage. Given the Holy Father’s intention to seek unity between Eastern Orthodox churches and Rome, how will these issues be reconciled, or better put, how can Rome accomodate the reality of Orthodox practice while being faithful to Church teaching?
When you say “living as brother and sister”, does that just mean they do not engage in the marital embrace, or should that be taken literaly and include any sort of romantic affection including stuff like cuddling up in front of the TV, hand holding and kissing?
Depends on where you live. If you live in the North, you can’t cuddle or kiss, because that wouldn’t be considered living as brother and sister. In the South… 😉
Phil,
That’s my question, too. But to extend it further – even if neither of the participants has this conscious thought, does having the marriage within a faith that does recognize the possibility of divorce and remarriage cause the validity to be taken into consideration?
Note that I’m not talking about Catholic marriages here. But, just to be provocative, what if the Church were to automatically consider any marriage performed within the context of an institution that recognizes the validity of remarriage after civil divorce to be an invalid marriage for the purposes of allowing a Catholic convert to obtain an annulment?
Is that a conversation starter?
The situation:
Older couple (60’s)
He = Catholic widower with strong Catholic faith.
She= Baptist (not active) with deep respect for the Catholic Church (willing to convert). Married twice.
First marriage divorced after 15 yrs and five children. First husband is now deceased.
Second marriage in a Baptist Church and divorced after 17 years and two children. Her second husband went from being a devoted Christian that was active in their Church…to and athiest that would curse God, Jesus and Mary and stated that he did it as a form on mental abuse against his wife for a number of years before their divorce. This “180” seems to have been triggered when he did not receive healing from a serious physical disorder. He is also a serious substance abuser that chose alcohol and drugs over his family and has a felony child abuse conviction.
As an older couple, money is short. Would she be a good candidate for an annulment from such a marriage?