Godzilla Prepares To Gobble Boy

MONSTER ISLAND (DAILY PLANET) – Supertitious natives inhabiting the atoll containing Monster Island have been discovered to be still practicing child sacrifice, as shown in the photograph below, showing a native boy being offered to Godzilla in an attempt to avert his wrath from their island.

U.N. officials have expressed horror at this practice, which is a violation of the international human rights charter.

It is also ineffective said Dr. Toshiro Ichiozaki of Tokyo University (Dept. of Monstrous Studies). "One kid is not going to satify the hunger of a 400-ft. tall beast like Godzilla. Invariably when islanders do this the beast simply eats the kid and then rampages through the village anyway. Under the influence of superstition, villagers have interpreted this as a sign that the sacrifice wasn’t of acceptable quality, but it isn’t a quality problem, it’s a quantity problem."

Dr. Toshiro added: "Further, the sacrifices themselves become ‘bait’ for Godzilla, luring him to their islands instead of letting him stay in the Monster Island Nature Preserve that ecologists insisted on creating for him in the 1970s."

Godzillaboy

CORRECTION: The above picture is actually a wire photo captioned "A boy plays under a ten-meter-high giant statue of Godzilla displayed at a botanical garden in Yokosuka, suburban Tokyo.(AFP/Toru Yamanaka)."

Author: Jimmy Akin

Jimmy was born in Texas, grew up nominally Protestant, but at age 20 experienced a profound conversion to Christ. Planning on becoming a Protestant seminary professor, he started an intensive study of the Bible. But the more he immersed himself in Scripture the more he found to support the Catholic faith, and in 1992 he entered the Catholic Church. His conversion story, "A Triumph and a Tragedy," is published in Surprised by Truth. Besides being an author, Jimmy is the Senior Apologist at Catholic Answers, a contributing editor to Catholic Answers Magazine, and a weekly guest on "Catholic Answers Live."

One thought on “Godzilla Prepares To Gobble Boy”

  1. I lived in Yokosuka for two years while homeported there on the the U.S.S. Midway. If Yokosuka is a suburb of Tokyo then that is quite a distance for a suburb.
    The funniest thing I ever saw was my first night out on the economy there. It was great walking around in a totally alien culture and was even stranger to see a six foot tall plastic Colonel Sanders in front of a KFC there – it was just too much out of place.

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