A reader writes:
Dear Jim: I note that please is a word that never shows up in the mass nor in our prayers. I know that Jesus gave us the words to the Our Father which does not include the word please. There are a number of places in that prayer where I (as a wretch) would feel please is appropriate (please give us this day our daily bread, please forgive us etc). Is it possible that please is not used because the language spoken by Jesus did not include such a word?
You’re on to something here, though the problem isn’t just confined to Aramaic, in which the Lord’s Prayer was originally given. It also affects Latin, which is determinative of Mass and most other standard prayers. Neither of these languages has a ready-made word for "please."
"Please" is so important in English politness that it boggles our minds how another langauge can make do without an equivalent to this word, just as our minds boggle that some languages (like Latin, Irish, and Mandarin) manage to make do without a word for "yes."
Thing is: Words like "please" and "yes" don’t really have meaning as such. They are "function words"–words used to perform specific functions. "Please" is a particle of entreaty and politeness, while "yes" is a particle of agreement or affirmation. (Particles are typically short words that never change their form and perform specific functions.)
But it isn’t the particles themselves that are important: It’s the functions they perform. Every language has a way to perform the functions of entreaty, politeness, agreement, and affirmation, they just don’t have handy particles to do it.
A common way in many languages to express entreaty, for example, is to use the imperative mood. That’s what’s going on in the Lord’s Prayer, for example. You look at it in Aramaic (or Greek or Latin), and the verbs in the petitions are in the imperative mood ("give us," "forgive us," "lead us not").
That’s where the problem comes in for us English speakers: The imperative mood does double-duty in languages like the ones just mentioned, where it can serve either to mark a request or a command, but in English since we’ve sloughed off the entreaty function to "please" and other constructions ("Can you . . . ?" "Would you . . . ?"), the imperative is much more associated with commands in English.
If you just bring over an Aramaic, Greek, or Latin imperative into English literally ("Give us this day our daily bread"), it can sound to us like we’re commanding God to do something, when to the speakers of the original languages, it would have been obvious that in these cases the imperative is being used to signal entreaty. (Nobody commands God around.)
The problem is significant enough that people who might be tempted into the Health & Wealth Gospel movement have to be warned about how not to interpret imperatives in the original languages. If you look in Bill Mounce’s book Basics of Biblical Greek, for example, he has a passage warning people against intepreting imperatives directed toward God as commands. All kinds of screwy Hagan-esque "Write your own ticket with God" theology can get started if you don’t recognize how to interpret imperatives toward God.
So you’re right: There ain’t an Aramaic word that is directly equivalent to "please." The language conveys requests and politeness in other ways. That leaves us (including me) as English-speakers wishing "please" was in our standard prayers, but it ain’t. The thing for us to do is to just relax and recognize that the function is being performed by the imperative mood and that we have to take this account when we’re saying our prayers.