A Human Moment

It’s been over a week now since God graced us with the election of his holiness, Pope Benedict XVI. On the day it happened, I was elated—and I still am!

Unfortunately, that day was the day I had to go out of town. I had only three hours between the time his election was announced and when I had to leave, and into that time I had to finish last minute packing, last minute message checking, last minute things at work—plus a couple of media appearances to comment on the election.

It was hectic!

Amid this swirl of events, I tossed a couple of ex-Cardinal Ratzinger’s books in my suitcase for reading on the trip and downloaded the audiobook version of Salt of the Earth for listening on my iPod. (Cowboy hat tip to the commenter who pointed out it is available from Audible.Com!)

But I had no time (substantively speaking) for blogging on the event.

Since I’m back, I thought I’d share with you something I thought when I first saw Benedict XVI emerge to greet the crowd and the world, waving his arms and smiling.

I thought he was having a very human moment.

Lemme ’splain: I am as certain as a certain certaintor on Certainty Day that Benedict XVI was God’s choice for pope. There were several fine gentlemen in the college of cardinals who could have served as worthy—even outstanding—successors to John Paul II (and to Peter), but Cardinal Ratzinger stood out like a gemstone, and I am thrilled and delighted that the divine element in the conclave expressed itself through the human element of the cardinals.

But the human element is always there. The cardinals could have used their free will in such a way that they could have elected an unworthy or even disastrous successor. However unlikely it was that this would happen (and I pointed out its unlikeliness before the conclave), it still remained up to the cardinals to exercise their free will in harmony with the motions of God’s grace.

And they did!

Among them was Cardinal Ratzinger, who had to accept his election in order to become pope.

He had to continue accepting his election on an emotional level even afterwards, and it seemed to me that he was still in the process of doing this when he first appeared.

When I saw the new pope emerge on the balcony, I detected something in his smile and wave and posture that suggested to me that the human element of the man born Josef Ratzinger was still adjusting to the new reality. The divine element of his role as the Vicar of Christ was still sinking in on him.

He was nervous. He wasn’t comfortable with his new role yet. He was doing what needed to be done in such a moment, but on a human level he still felt like a humble cardinal “playing the role” of pope—not one comfortable with the role and the weight of responsibility that God had placed on his shoulders.

It reminded me of a moment in I, Claudius where, just after Claudius has been proclaimed emperor, he keeps taking his crown off in private and tells his friend, Herod Agrippa, “I feel like a fraud!”

Herod places the crown back on Claudius’ head and wisely tells him: “You won’t once you begin to work.”

I suspect something like that is happening here.

Benedict XVI originally emerged onto the balcony still feeling like he was Cardinal Ratzinger. But as he sets his hand to the plough and pushes more furrows through the ecclesiastical ground, he will feel more and more like what he is: Benedict XVI.

There’s nothing like experience on the job.